here kitty kitty ...

It's Friday, after a long week of work. One of my coworkers told me of this great massage place to go to. I had recently kinked up my neck in my valiant efforts to begin working out again, and I thought that was just the thing I needed to unwind and prepare for a weekend that would undoubtedly involve my friend Mr. Grey Goose. So I head over to the massage place, Mill Valley Massage, and am treated to a great full body rub down (get your minds out of the gutter), where again I learned that my legs do not like getting massaged, it just tickles too much.

I digress. This post ultimately ends with my cat as is evidenced by the title. So the massage is great and I head home still covered in a light film of massage oils. It felt like the feeling you get when you are at the beach and put your clothes on over your sunscreen. Anyhow, I arrive at my home and am still very relaxed from the massage. Before I make plans for the evening I want to take a quick little nap.

I crawl into my bed and am manuevering the covers around when I see it. And by it I mean the nice little dollop of shit that my cat left in my covers. Two questions crossed my mind: 1) Why in the hell did my cat shit in my bed and 2) how long as the shit been there. Have I been sleeping with shit for the past few nights. I have a pretty large bed all too myself, for all I know the cat has been using it as her goddamn litter box.

In the matter of a few moments my relaxed self was unrelaxed and quite alert from the now apparent shit smell that was covering my bed. Strange that this one moment in my life gives credence to the saying, "I slept like (in) shit."

After cleaning up the little mess and burning my bed sheets (not really) I did a little investigating. Sure enough as I suspected my cat had left me a dingleberry of a shit that it had strutted around the house.

There were some smears of shit on the bathroom floor where her litter box is and more remnanats in the entry. It makes me wonder if my cat purposefully toted her little dingleberry around until she was able to ceremoniously drop it on my bed.

I may never know...